A "language barrier" story from Marsha R., of Baton Rouge:
"Your comment that you had still not mastered the English language reminded me:
"Years ago, I was a student nurse at Our Lady of the Lake when it was still 'on the lake.'
"As a first-year student, my 'nursing' consisted of talking to the patient, getting ice jugs, making beds, giving bed baths and alcohol back rubs.
"I had been caring for a sweet gentleman for a week when he asked me where I was from. I told him I was from Hawaii.
"He very slowly and carefully said, 'You … speak … English … very … well.'
"I replied, 'Thank … you … but … I … am … still … learning.'”
Nutty name
Elaine Babin says, "When I was in Georgia. I bought a bag of pecans at Kroger.
"Back home, I called the Kroger in Shreveport to see if they had some.
"I was put on hold three times, with a different person answering each time.
"I asked for 'pecans,' not realizing till I moved up here that they are pronounced 'peecans.'"
Blame Rev. Spooner
Russ Wise, of LaPlace, says my mention of "sand hanitizers" wasn't a malapropism, it was a spoonerism.
"Named for an Anglican clergyman, the Rev. W.A. Spooner (1844-1930), a spoonerism is when someone accidentally reverses the first letters of a couple of words.
"Some folks reverse phrases: 'belly jeans.'
"The pastor was heard to say at the end of a marriage ceremony, 'It's kisstomary to cuss the bride.'"
Don't ride it!
Adding to our armadillo file is Tim Palmer, of Lafayette:
"In the early 1970s, when the Gonzales Jambalaya Festival was in downtown Gonzales, my Methodist Youth Fellowship group operated a spin-art booth as a fundraiser.
"One night, one of the other members, Jimmy Hamilton, and I decided to spend the night in the booth to be sure nothing was tampered with.
"In the middle of the night, we went for a walk. We happened upon an armadillo, so Jimmy decided to see if he could touch it.
"A Gonzales police officer drove up about the time Jimmy got his hand on the back of the critter. I had never seen an armadillo buck before, but this one did.
"The policeman and I had a good laugh."
Shorts story
Susan Hunt, of New Orleans, calls this "Things our parents did for us":
"When I was a young teenager, it became the style for girls to wear wool Bermuda shorts, even though they didn't make much sense.
"I bothered my mom for them morning, noon and night.
"We weren't rich; not even comfortable. My mother, tired of hearing about them, cut up a wool skirt of hers and made a pair of shorts for me.
"I was a skinny kid and the wool was thick, accentuating my skinny legs even more. I think I wore them once, then put them in the back of a drawer."
Hump day
C.J., of Lafayette, tells this tale of picky eaters:
"I was 15 when Dad and family got transferred to Tripoli, Libya.
"We were told to be careful buying beef, as you could end up with camel meat.
"Months went by with Dad grilling steaks, no problem.
"Then one time Dad came home with steaks and grilled them.
"As we sat down to eat, my step-mom says, 'These steaks look different.'
"We all made a beeline for the kitchen to make sandwiches."
Let it wave
Regarding our mentions of Boy Scout camping adventures, Michael Hess, of Slidell, says, "I guess you don't want to hear about the time my brother hung my underwear on the flagpole at Scout camp in the Rocky Mountains outside of Denver. I'm still holding a grudge over it."