Dear Smiley: When my nephew was 13 (already towering well over 6 feet) he came to me for advice:
"When is my dad going to stop calling me his baby? I am not a baby!"
Being the baby of my family, I understood and empathized with his dilemma.
I could hear echoes of myself begging my mom not to call me a baby.
I broke the news to him: "Stephen, I am 40 years old, and your grandma still calls me her baby. You are always going to stay your dad’s baby. Instead of fighting it, learn to embrace it and wear it as a badge of honor."
DALE MARKS
Baton Rouge
Tough life
Dear Smiley: About 15 years ago, I joined a duck hunting lease in northern Evangeline Parish on a huge rice/crawfish farm.
People occasionally get bogged down in their vehicles, but friendly farmworkers pull you out and send you on your way.
It happened to me, and a longtime farmhand came with a big tractor to help me.
As I was hooking up the tow chain to my truck I said, "I hope this is easy."
He muttered, "Easy! It’s NEVER easy."
I remember thinking this was one guy who truly knew the struggles of this world. And gave thanks for the cushy world I lived in.
ALEX "SONNY" CHAPMAN
Ville Platte
Big splash
Dear Smiley: I was once a mechanic at an industrial shop in Baton Rouge.
Working on old equipment, it was normal to use a torch to heat rusty nuts and bolts, etc., to red hot, then quench them in a drum of water, making them easier to disassemble.
Once, I was lowering a hot part into the drum when water splashed out.
One co-worker noticed, saying maybe I didn't understand the law of displacement. Another co-worker, knowing I was a Navy veteran, said, "Give him a break; he's used to putting a SHIP in the OCEAN!"
KERRY LeBLANC
Taos, New Mexico
Aka drumsticks
Dear Smiley: When 4-year-old daughter Lori (now 53) heard me mention the proverbial question, "What came first, the chicken or the egg?" out popped an immediate answer: "The chicken, of course. Eggs don't have legs!"
MARY DUDLEY ALFONSO
Spanaway, Washington
(With deep family roots in Hammond)
Missing guest
Dear Smiley: I caught a rather large king snake one evening in my driveway. I put it in an old glass aquarium, with heavy chicken wire on top, weighed down by a heavy dictionary.
I left all this on the kitchen table (not the garage for some stupid reason). In the morning, I would bring him to the pet shop.
Next morning, I was shocked to see the chicken wire was slid over, and the snake was missing!
We looked high and low for that snake, for days. I even put a "pinky" mouse in the aquarium, surrounded by raw rice to see if the snake could be enticed back to his former prison. No luck.
To make matters worse, I had to leave to go back overseas. My wife was livid. My three kids, excited but wary.
I got the phone call after I arrived at work that the snake had been found. It had hid itself in the coils of our sofa. My wife heard a "thump" while sitting in the den when it fell to the floor.
My next-door neighbor did the honors of capturing the snake and shuffling it, along with the pinky mouse, to the pet store.
PETER DASSEY
Kenner
Takes the cake
Dear Smiley: One afternoon, my mother informed me that we were having "shortberry strawcake" for dessert.
After many years we still laugh about that!
MARIEANNE ARATA
Waggaman