"It could only happen in the Army," says Russ Wise, of LaPlace.
"Being trained as a tanker, I was assigned to teach infantry patrolling skills to intelligence officers and NCOs at Fort Devens, Massachusetts, as they prepared to go to Southeast Asia.
"It was an Army thing. None of these guys would ever see combat; few would see Vietnam.
"I was leading a patrol down a dirt road in the jungles of Massachusetts when a blacksnake slithered across the road in front of us. I grabbed it and it bit me.
“‘Go to the post hospital!' a young lieutenant shouted.
“‘Don't worry, sir,' I replied. 'It's not poisonous.'
“‘But it may have rabies!' he replied.
"Snakes can't get rabies, but he wouldn't take no for an answer, and he was an officer. So I did."
More 'childspeak'
Our daughter, Emily, was very creative with words when she was very young," says Susan Koehler.
"When she wanted some of everything, she said, 'I want the whole schmigabob! (smorgasbord).
"She used her words so often that we called them 'Emlish,' and created an Emlish dictionary.
"Now Emily's son, Michael, does the same thing. He says his dad is from 'Daddy'sburg' (Hattiesburg).
"When Michael was about 3½, we were visiting him in Colorado. One morning, he bounded into our room and jumped on the bed. I asked him why he was being so rambunctious. He responded by asking, 'Why are you calling me a monkey chicken?'
"Little sister Lissy is trying to talk now, and we can't wait to hear what words of wisdom come from her mouth!"
Say what?
Diane T. Martin, of Morgan City, says, "The linguist Richard Lederer has turned 'fractured English' into more than 60 books. Some examples:
“‘Send your absentees to the office.' 'That’s water under the dam' (bridge).' 'We’re back to square zero' (one)."
Be prepared
Henry Bradsher, of Baton Rouge, says, "The use of a digitally projected version of the Mississippi State stadium to prepare LSU quarterback Jayden Daniels for a game there came decades after a similar preparation for President Ronald Reagan.
"Before his 1985 meeting in Geneva with Soviet Communist Party leader Mikhail Gorbachev, Reagan's staff ordered extensive preparations.
"They wanted the old actor to visualize what to expect, just like movie sets, in addition to what to say.
"Short movie segments were created to show him the meeting entrance, the hall he would walk down, what Gorbachev would look like, where they would sit, etc.
"But two days of talks failed to ease the Cold War."
Special People Dept.
- Leon E. Perret, of Kenner, has his 100th birthday Friday, May 3. He will celebrate Sunday, May 5, with relatives and friends. He is a Navy veteran of World War II, owner of Perret's Men's Wear in New Orleans and several Army/Navy stores in Jefferson Parish.
- Lela Bourgeois celebrates her 100th birthday Sunday, May 5, at Sno's Seafood and Steak in Gonzales with "over 120 of her family and a few close friends."
- Lucille Hughes, of Baton Rouge, celebrates her 98th birthday Friday, May 3. During World War II she worked in the Pentagon.
- Mary Ella Castille, of Breaux Bridge, celebrates her 90th birthday Saturday, May 4.
Getting the reds
I received several comments on team nicknames after I suggested "Fighting Mosquitoes" as a fine name for a Louisiana-based team.
For instance, Alan R. Crnko, of Holden, suggests the worst mascot/nickname name in college football:
"My mind instantly went to 'Crimson Tide.' Still trying to figure out why."
(While we're at it, what's with the elephant that 'Bama uses as another mascot?)